Barley Mowat 

It Comes

with one comment

Just a quick update today since I’m busy with other things. It has come to my attention that some of the neophytes whom count amongst my readers have yet to open accounts on The Twitter. To those few, I say “for shame!” Not only have you missed the sheer amazement of Justin Bieber’s famous “IM SEXY AND I KNOW IT” tweet and it’s subsequent, record setting, 69,000 retweets, you’re also completely missing out on solid intel on upcoming BC seasonal craft beer releases.

Intel such as the release date of the widely acknowledged* best beer in BC: Driftwood Singularity. So brace yourself for beer geeks storming into shops and buying bottles of this with all the decorum and civility of a mother from November 1982 looking for Cabbage Patch Kids. Sigh. I just realized how very old I am, but I digress.

I was sorely tempted to just straight up lie and say it’s coming out on Wednesday to buy me extra time, but that wouldn’t be fair, would it? So here’s the straight dope: Monday. It’s coming out Monday (and maybe Tuesday, depending on your store), but with this information comes a serious warning.

I will be shopping for this beer, and upon entering a shop, after I conclude the hand shakes, posing for photographs, kissing of babies and occasional boob signing that generally accompanies any public appearance by me**, if I see you holding the last bottle of Singularity I will rip it from your hands and use it to bludgeon you to death. And then I will do unspeakable things to your body to teach others a lesson. Be warned***.

* By me. I’m wide. Get it? Nothing? You guys suck.

** My doctor feels that the ever-widening gulf between reality as perceived by me versus “others” is cause for concern. I told her that she’s unable to accept my fame for what it is, then I signed her boob.

*** No clever joke here. Seriously, be warned.

Written by chuck

January 11th, 2013 at 1:44 pm

Posted in Beers

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One Response to 'It Comes'

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  1. Singularity better than Sartori?

    TB

    14 Jan 13 at 14:33

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